I haven't posted anything in over a month. In the two years Rock and Sky has been live, I have never gone that long without posting. As I was explaining to a friend today, when I write, it's like I'm giving out a piece of myself. There is no such thing as "just a post" for me, not really. Each thing I write takes effort, has emotion and inspiration. When I write, it's my gift. But what happens when you just don't have anything to give any more?
Blue skies on the perfect drive. This fall has been hard for me, both personally and professionally. I'm busy recreating myself in a new town and in a new life, and at some point, I just ran out of things to give. I can't write when I can't be authentic, and my authentic self is pretty empty at the moment.
As I write this though, it's starting to fill back up. The one thing that has kept me from being completely empty this semester has been gratitude.
Gratitude is more than an emotion, it's a state of mind. It's a way of looking at the world. Hardship and sadness can cloud your view and drain your energy, but you have the ability to shift your own world back in to focus. Choose gratitude.
My life, at this moment, is filled with amazing people. I've met friends who've offered support and love I though I'd never experience. People, many across the country, constantly offer help, sweet words, late night listening ears and comfort. Just thinking about how these people, with their own lives, take time for me - I can't express enough how grateful I am for them.
Not only people, but I've found place and opportunity as well. I love Boulder. It's constantly sunny, and I can bike wherever I need to go. I have several great jobs where I'm using my talents, and one where I can zone out like a zombie. My dog is happy here. She is still with me and healthy. I can climb whenever I want to. The coffee and beer here are great too...
Feel loss and sorrow, that's ok, but don't let them empty you to where you have nothing left to offer. Spend some time meditating on what you have to be grateful for in your life. That will spill into your day, and you will begin being more gracious to others.
The best part about gratitude is that you can cultivate it in your own life. It comes from inside of you, and you can create more. Choose to be grateful, then take action to create more reasons to be grateful. Treat your friends better. Volunteer with those who have less than you do. Get a new pet. Find a new local treasure. Read an amazing book. Take time for your family. New reasons to be grateful will appear, and give you strength through the hard times.
I am so very grateful for you,
Aleya
